5.4 KiB
Outcomes
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Daily meaningful activities
using skills you already have
gets you into flow.
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Flow frequently brings outcomes:
- emotional outcomes (makes us happy)
- material outcomes (fruits of our labour)
Outcomes keep us going.
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But sometimes...
we get derailed by bad mood
- by negative events or emotions around us
- due to our own failing
- by recalling a negative past
and lose our flow.
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Negativity captures our attention
more than positivity.
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So we stay down
due to the negative feedback loop:
Negativity and pessimism reinforce themselves.
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We need emotional stability to keep us going.
Hamster in a box
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Hamster in a box
- when put in a box with a lid, it will try to jump out
- and after a day or two it will give up and never try again
- even once the lid is removed
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Learned helplessness
[Martin Seligman]
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Baby Elephant Syndrome
Hamster Procrastination Cycle
- Do nothing
- Have regrets
- Doubt yourself
- Feel helpless
- GOTO 1
How to break out?
Time Perspectives
[Philip Zimbardo]
- positive past
- negative past
- present
- future
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Focusing on
positive past- negative past
- present
future
results in a hamster, depressions.
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Refocusing on
- positive past
negative pastpresent- future
breaks out of the hamster.
Positive Cycle of Flow
- Do meaningful actions
- Feel good
- Growing skills
- Believe in yourself
- GOTO 1
How to orient yourself towards the future?
Personal Vision
How to perceive your past positively?
Choice of attitude
We are free to choose our reaction to events.
[Viktor Frankl]
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We choose how we interpret our past.
TOOL: Choice of attitude
(originally named Inner-game; not related to Timothy Gallwey's work)
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Interpreting seemingly negative events
as neutral or even positive.
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Event → 😟/😐/😀
Default:
Failure → 😟
Choice:
Failure → 😐/😀
Micro-habit that can be trained.
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My switched attitudes
- Calming down my expectation of perfect social interactions
- "This went well, we both enjoyed the chat."
- Burying past failures
- "At least I learned to do something new!"
TOOL: Three Good Things
[Martin Seligman] (Learned Optimism)
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At the end of every day,
think about 3 things
that went well for you.
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Why?
Increases positive emotions, hope and optimism.
Strengthens your focus on positive past.
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My Good Things?
Done daily during dinner as a family.
- chatted with my coworkers over coffee
- resolved one bug
- finally gave my talk on procrastination